In short, no. If both parties are using the app responsibly, casual sex will, on the whole, be more pleasant and fulfilling for you and your partner than the alternative: sex in a relationship that isn’t based on honest attraction. And remember — there is nothing inherently wrong with sex before you’re ready for more.
Casual sex’s not good for you? No, nothing’s bad for you — it’s when you do it when you aren’t truly okay with it that it’s harmful. The trouble comes from all the different ways people interpret “casual sex” — both in their own way and what others think it means. There’s often confusion around casual sex’s effects, and whether or not hookup culture is the reason why more sex-related issues have come to the forefront in recent years, it’s becoming increasingly apparent that a lack of education and a disconnect between conventional sex education and the people engaging in it is a major reason why Americans are struggling to understand the emotional and physical aspects of sex and dating.
The Casual Sex Mythology So far, we’ve taken a look at the ways that you could view casual sex: as strictly a luxury, as a kind of pleasure for consenting adults only, or as something done without the need for long-term commitment. But, while there are plenty of unfortunate effects of casual sex, casual sex as a way of life doesn’t necessarily cause or stop bad things from happening.
If you want to have more than one sexual partner, that’s fine. This is your right, but being honest about the ethical gray areas that come with this right is important. You might think that only having multiple sexual partners will make you happier, but people who are concerned with the notion of casual sex often conclude that they only want sex for the sake of having sex. Ultimately, they feel they shouldn’t have to work to meet someone’s expectations if they aren’t willing to reciprocate the same amount of effort. This concept is called the transactional exchange, and there is both a positive and negative impact of trying to be in a transactional exchange.
However, sex remains better than abstinence, and for most people, not even that is the ideal or even only way that sex should be. With that in mind, here’s the casual sex myth that doesn’t exactly hold up.
casual sex apps That’s not to say that casual sex is itself a problem — approached properly, if anything, it can be and is
After all, why not just save yourself and your energy and do the dirty deed with the first guy that looks enticing? It would also prevent you from having to go through all of the really work involved in a relationship — like making dinners, watching his kids, and dealing with his shit. Just give your luck the best shot, right? And if you have some extra money in your hand, why not splurge?
By 2020, a quarter of Americans will use at least four methods for casual sex — hooking up, friends with benefits, anonymous sex, and the occasional threesome. It’s part of the fabric of our social lives now, and as Christine Fox, science professor at Stanford University, explains, it’s no longer something you can only do on weekends. It’s integrated into our daily lives.
Using artificial insemination to reproduce without bothering the other person who conceived in your embryo is just as awkward as it sounds. Besides, this sort of casual sex gets extremely complicated when you go beyond a single evening.
Oh — and there’s also the matter of sex toys. They’re becoming increasingly popular, and because they’re completely private and you can control all aspects of their use, they’re a great way to go into a sexual experience more comfortably.
You can also read about why we love sex so much here: Science of love: From the moment we choose to have sex, our brains are hardwired to fall in love. Now what?
But in order to have casual sex for the right reasons, you need to know how and why you feel that way. Are you really into this person? Is he a good person who happens to be attractive to you? Is he actually the one you think you’re dating?
According to a new study from Janavas Hyett, a public affairs professor at the University of California, Berkeley, students who never had sex during high school said that sex — and sexual satisfaction — was extremely important, even if they didn’t want to have it. The ones who did have sex — casual or otherwise — said that it was totally fine to do it with someone else, and that it didn’t necessarily mean they wanted to have sex with him.
How to Have Casual Sex and Get the Best Sex of Your Life
No matter what sort of casual fling you’re into (the single guys on Grindr or Pick Up Your Girls in An Uber is fine, too), you should know this: casual sex isn’t always what you expect. So read this